However, there was always something that bugged me when I set foot on campus. It felt as if something was missing, that something seemed out of place. I first attributed this to our campus' lack of anything close to a shade of green save U Yard and that patch of grass behind South Hall. Maybe the lack of oxygen given off by the 4 trees on our campus was finally getting to me? After careful thought, I realized this emptiness was much deeper than the shallow, dead roots of the grass around Foggy Bottom. I realized that GW was missing a key ingredient of the college experience.
Foreign countries don't count as GW green space
We were missing a college football team.
Arguably the most visible (and largest revenue producing) facet of college life, the one most cliched in every college movie ever made, was absent from GW.
My mind began to race. What is a college without a Saturday morning filled with drunken co-eds, helmet-to-helmet contact, and ridiculous traditions? How could I have overlooked such a glaring fact in all of my college reference books? Who can I blame for such an egregious offense?
After an extensive Internet search (read: 5 minutes on wikipedia), I discovered to my dismay that at one time, GW did have a football team. Back in the 1960's. A combination of low attendance, lack of an on campus stadium, and lack of wins (6-20 over 3 years is still better than Kansas, just saying) led to the decision to terminate the football program in January of 1967. In a related side note, the termination of the football program allowed the university to focus its attention on the men's basketball program and pump in money to build a new field house.
Extra points for the Coach wearing a bowler cap
Thanks a lot basketball! Ruining all of our fun with your flopping and 3 point shots. It is however much harder to be mad at them now that they are actually winning games (congrats on the 12-2 boys).
So what is a man supposed to do when the thing he wants most is taken from him? Wallow in self-pity? Angrily destroy half of his belongings in a frenzied rage? Drink himself into a stupor until he can't even remember what a football looks like? A healthy combo of all three?
I don't want your football-less life, GW!
No, in a situation like this, a man must take back what is rightfully his. And I did just that...by parking my ass on the nearest couch every Saturday morning to watch all the games that I can't actually attend. If I can't be a part of the drunken co-ed tailgating experience here at GW, I'll do the next best thing and watch other people actively participate on TV. Since I don't have a team to watch, I'll just have to watch everybody else's.
This is where this blog comes into play. Since I am a highly opinionated and vocal person, this blog will be my voice after I lose mine shouting at the QB for making the wrong read during the option and turning a 5 yard gain into a 3 yard loss. However, since the college football season ended two days ago with FSU beating Auburn 34-31 in the BCS National Championship, my focus will now turn to commenting on the off season moves of each team. That means all coaching changes, transfers, recruiting classes, draft announcements, spring practices, tweets, and endless reruns of this season highlights. Well maybe not all bits of news (sorry Kansas, you are going to have to do a lot better to impress me).
THE DEFENSIVE END STAYED HOME! HAND IT OFF!
Welcome to the show everyone. It's a one man tailgate, but it is sure to get rowdy.
And remember: Go Colonials Football! Undefeated since 1966.
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